fun at subway in arlington

Just poppin' in for a quick story time, then it's back to work counting down the minutes to seafair and refreshing weather.com every 12 minutes imploring the weekend forecast to improve. What's seafair? only the most amazing time of the year in Seattle... better than christmas! More on that later.

About last night.

So my lil bro Gabe and I were on our way back from sarvey after 5 hours of fun times with wild animals. I managed to make it out of there with only a little raccoon shit in my hair, so it was a good night.

We pulled up to Subway for dinner at 9:58 pm, just two minutes before they closed. We still had a good hour long drive ahead of us. Gabe and I wait patiently to order our subs while, likely reeking of God knows what... but then (I kid you not) the large man in front of us orders his sub: white bread, cheddar cheese, olives, ranch dressing and 3 chocolate chip cookies IN THE SUB. *Don't think that's what Jared had in mind... just saying*

The kids behind the counter were struggling to keep it together, as were we. ... Strangely this made me feel a little bit better about our smell :-)

Anyway, we get our sandwiches and while Gabe's paying - his treat! - I head out to the car... only to discover *SHITSKITTLES* the doors are locked. With my keys (cell phone, money, ID, etc. etc.) in the car.

I never lock my car door. In fact, as I type this my car is sitting outside unlocked with the keys inside of it. Call me stupid, but unless I'm in the city or a sketchy part of town, I don't lock the door. Definitely not for a 5 minute stop at Subway.

Well, Gabe felt pretty bad. Yes, my 14 year old brother locked me (us) out of the car over an hour from home... past my bedtime... in Arlington. You may have heard of Arlington as I'm pretty sure it was in the news recently when a man suffered fatal injuries after having sex with (being penetrated by) a horse. Yes, this confuses me too.

Anyway, Subway Boy said he might have a SlimJim to get my car open. When I think SlimJim, I think:

Apparently, a "slimjim" is actual a tool that criminals use to break in to cars. Why Subway Boy had one... well, I didn't ask.

I told him to give it a go, but he clearly didn't have much practice with it - good boy - so I called AAA. And by I, I mean Gabe, because I did not have my trusty BB with me (for shame!) and I am about as useful a chocolate teapot with his alien music touch phone thinger.

They tell me it's going to be an hour, so I tell them I am going to cry. Seriously. I said that...

I said, I'm going to cry if it takes an hour because I have nothing but a t-shirt on (I forgot to mention pants - oops!) and it is cold out and we're hours from home and there's nowhere to go...

A little exaggeration never hurt anyone....

So, AAA calls back to tell me they have a closer company who'll be here in 10. I Win!!!

Less than five minutes later, a tow-truck rolls up and Mountain Man, with a cigarette hanging from his mouth, jumps out and immediately gets to work on the car. No hi, how are you, who are you. Nada. Mountain Man finishes the job before his cigarette (and strangely I never saw him remove it from his mouth to exhale the entire time... this must be a finely developed skill... quite impressive).

And we're off.

But not before Subway Boy tells me, "Be sure to come back next week, it was great to meet you."

Well, I guess if things with Joe don't work out, I know I have options!